Cooch Braids

No Colony / NYC weekend went down like a hooker with a crunch eye, I mean we ate a lot and I moved my mouth and looked at people and felt happy in my inside.

Seriously, the reading couldn't have gone much better, great crowd (thanks!), beerz, smart readers (everyone kept it short and sweet and there were never any 'oh fuck this guy's drifting into the void of his own mind's grandeur' moments).

Got to hang with lots of the online friendlies I never get to see and met some new faces I've talked with for loveyoulongtime on the internet, NEW MEETS = Shane Jones is a real dude and smiles nicely (he has videos from the reading here on his blog I forgot to tape them myself damn it), Ken Baumann is genuine and refreshing and funny in a way others are often not funny, and good, Nick Antosca is svelte and righteous and a good person to have lunch with, GianCarlo DiTrapano hypnotized me with his No Colony reading and was killer nice to boot, Catherine Lacey is a gentlewoman with class (got copy of her new chapbook with Chelsea Martin and Ellen Kennedy just out from Happy Cobra Books, it looks awesome, I have a blurb on it), Leigh Stein was sweet and I wished I'd been less drunk so I could talk better, Gabe Durham was like a wise cousin, Joe Salvatore felt genuine and kind, and etc etc etc so many names and faces, good to be in the house.

I vaguely remember yelling about eating a baby on the back porch on some bar and interrupting some dude on a date, said dude who then tried to scorn me for talking about eating babies in public, his mind was turning behind his eyes trying to think of Dane Cook joke, they left quick.

I didn't black out, you owe me $5 Jereme. :)

I didn't ask anyone to tell me a story about France.

Eating at a Mexican diner at 4 am with some of the above + the ever-awesome Robert Lopez and Mister Master Mike Young was a place I wish I could press a button anytime I want and return to, blearing drunkenly at those around us and the neon cake case, gorging.

Thanks to Justin & Tao for putting me up and leading me around, that was nice and kind.

Leaving my email and rss feeder basically untouched for 5 days feels like letting your bush grow huge all up and down your legs.

Last night on the long drive home accidentally stayed on i-95 instead of getting on i-85, ended up 2 hours out of the way, ended up invoking a small carnival town owned by a man named Pedro where all the buildings were named after Pedro and with huge ceramic mexican men standing around, then we invoked a demon road by playing Fantomas's DELIRIVM CORDIA loud on a road through nowhere, I saw the road topple sideways, we were going down,

you can invoke another land there, in South Carolina, I am sure of it, there will be more.

Listening to REMAIN IN LIGHT 7 times through thereafter will cut you in little ribbons under the ribbons in your cooch braids

There is too much to say now, my email is shitting in my hair, will come back later or some

** ALSO: you must read this **