I should probably be in a good mood but I'm still not.
A really good thing is happening, it seems. I'm not going to talk about it specifically for a while.
It concerns things that will manifest themselves almost one full year from now. It concerns words and time with words and like that.
I don't know, I wonder if I will get to a point that I do enough or have done enough on any given day that I feel satisfied or relaxed. I don't even know what I am looking for, I have found threads of it, and yet the more I do my nature seems to stay in one point, when it comes to certain things.
That is very vague.
All of this blather is vague-ish, I should probably delete it.
Things right now are very good.
I should feel gracious.
I really do, it is only in myself that I feel misaiming, or like every day is so short, or that I haven't found the button that slows the slur speed or something.
Today I reread a lot of Gary Lutz's STORIES IN THE WORST WAY. It'd been too long. On a sentence by sentence level it is probably one of the most pristine and wise books ever written. You could really take almost every single line and put it on a page by itself and show it to someone and have them be taken aback a little, or at least look and remember the words a while after, even out of context, more so than other words.
If you haven't read it, read it, move it to the top of your list. If you've read it, read it again. That's good advice.
I am a purple colored cistern.
I don't know what to do when I realize certain things.
Nice boy good boy.
There is a new issue of DIAGRAM up, I always get a little giddy when they put up a new one, I read it all, I usually click through and find the fiction or things shaped like fiction then I read the contributor notes then I read the poems, I like the author notes they let authors supply that illuminate or deviate from the text.
This issue has the fabulous Kathy Regina and Atlanta brethren Benjamin Solomon, both of those pieces are really strong and make me want to write.
Diagram, maybe that's the best thing about them: they make me want to write.
Sometimes I will keep certain texts on Diagram open on my browser behind the MS Word while I am writing and peek back and forth at them, I like the shapes of the texts.
I like the show I LOVE MONEY, I can't help it, I have watched every episode, some several times, when I miss one I feel anxious, I look for it to appear on ON DEMAND, I check sometimes often to see if they will update and put the new one on there, I can't help it.
WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE? has a new format, they tell you the categories of the questions now all in advance, and the contestants now have limited amounts of time to answer, it makes me sad.
I really don't watch that much TV, except when I feel bloated or it is very late and I have written all day.
I had a sentence in my head in the car today and I forgot it, that sentence was going to be a book
Every day I could probably make several sentences that would become a book, it's not an issue
I feel haphazard and giddy
I forget everything unless I write it down or don't forget it
Each snardvunt is a palimpeses in my gunt.
I am writing another book now, I can only do a couple lines a day on it, the lines are very broken up on the page, it about a woman who works in a grocery store, I think I am ripping off David Markson again, I don't care, it is going to take me a long time to write it I think, I want the book one day to be 450-550 pages of mostly single sentences or small sentence clusters making up each paragraph, I like reading books like that, I want it to be my semi-minimalist version of THE TUNNEL
THE TUNNEL is the greatest accomplishment in literature, as is also INFINITE JEST
suck my dick